Гусары денег не берут!

Надо было одного человека из бара домой отвезти. Подъехал ко входу, жду. Выходит девушка, садится ко мне в машину. Но поскольку я ждал вовсе не её, то сначала подумал, что она с тем человеком, которого я жду. А она невозмутимо посмотрела на меня и сказала: “Ну чего стоим? Поехали!”. Я быстро сообразил, что прилично выпившая девушка просто перепутала меня с таксистом. Настроение было хорошее и я решил сразу не обламывать её, а немного поприкалываться.

– Куда едем?
– Улица Ленина, дом 45.
– Поесть дома что-нибудь есть?
– Что?
– Еда есть какая-нибудь?
– Есть. А почему вас это интересует?
– Проголодался, есть хочу.
– Что?
– Голодный я очень
– А мне то что? Я вас кормить не собираюсь.
– Ну тогда я никуда не поеду.
– Это ещё почему?!
– Моя религия запрещает мне брать с людей деньги, я работаю за еду.
– Какая ещё религия?! Ни разу не видела такого наглого таксиста! Я буду жаловаться!

– Кому?
– Вашему начальству
– Да пожалуйста. Можете прямо щас позвонить. Телефон дать?
– А вот и позвоню! Давайте телефон!

Диктую свой номер. Девушка начинает нервно тыкать в телефон, а я, еле сдерживая смех, отключаю на своей мобиле звук, чтобы не спалиться раньше времени.

– Никто не cheap Oakleys sunglasses берёт трубку!
– А вы подождите подольше
– Это вы ждите, а я ждать не буду!

Девушка выпрыгивает из машины, громко хлопая дверью. Я решаю, что если прикалываться, то уж по-полной, захожу в “Неотвеченные” fotos и набираю её номер.

– Алё. Машинку вызывали?
– Да
– Выходите. Машинка подъехала.
– Я уже вышла, но ваш водитель хам! Пришлите нормального водителя!
– Вам прислали отличного водителя, просто дайте ему что-нибудь поесть.
– Что?
– Накормите его ужином, ну или мороженку хотябы купите.
– Что за чушь вы говорите?
– Это не чушь! Этот человек не берёт денег, он работает за еду.
– Я не собираюсь его кормить!
– Ну в крайнем случае можете ему машину Cheap Jerseys заправить. Объясните ему, что бензин – это еда для его машины.
– Да вы похоже все там за еду работаете!
– А как вы догадались?
– Никак! Я буду жаловаться!

Девушка бросает трубку. Но на этом история не заканчивается. Через пару минут она перезванивает.

– Алё. Такси?
– Да
– С nba jerseys sales кем я говорю? Мне нужен кто-нибудь из начальства.
– Вы говорите с директором, я вас слушаю.
– Ваши сотрудники ужасные хамы, я намерена подать на вас в суд!
– Да вы что?! Расскажите подробнее, что случилось?
– Ничего не буду рассказывать. Встретимся в суде. Как называется ваше такси?
– “Гусары”
– Не поняла.
– Наше такси называется “Гусары”. Помните наверое такую фразу из старого анекдота: “Гусары денег не берут”? Вот и мы денег не берём, работаем за еду.
– Всё! Моему терпению пришёл предел! Я точно oakley outlet подам в суд!
– Подавайте, но учтите, что если суд выиграем мы, то в качестве компенсации не потребуем денег. Вам придётся целый год по пятницам бесплатно кормить player)] и поить весь наш дружный мужской коллектив в самых дорогих ресторанах города.

Когда я рассказал эту историю человеку, которого ждал, то он долго смеялся. А потом распросил как выглядела девушка, попросил её номер и начал ей звонить.

– Алё. Девшка, машинку заказывали? … Как не у нас? А у кого же? … А машина cheap nba jerseys какая? … Вы наверное что-то путаете, это наша машинка. Ждите, щас приедет … Ах вы уже едете? Ну тогда приятной поездочки … Это вам спасибо, за то что пользуетесь услугами нашего такси. Только не забудьте покормить водителя! … Леночка, не надо так кричать.

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